It is the mighty tree that crashes to the earth during a storm whereas a flexible sapling bends to powerful winds. When the storm is over, it is the supple sapling that has survived, not the uprooted tree. As we grow old, it is our teeth that fall out. Our tongues, which have no bones, remain intact. The single true indicator of life is tenderness. Death is indicated by rigidity. In the Tao Te Ching it is said, “The living are soft and flexible. Grasses, plants and trees, as they grow, are tender and supple. The dead are rigid, unmoving, dry and brittle. When we die, we become hard and stiff. When an army becomes inflexible, it suffers defeat. The hard and strong will fail, while the open-hearted prevail.”
People who resist change usually find their lives becoming pretty uncomfortable. They break when they come under pressure. However, people who are malleable reinvent and resurrect themselves after undergoing great calamities. When we become rule-obsessed, or too self-righteous, we destroy personal relationships and become isolated. “Those whose virtue is hard and those whose actions are forceful die before their time, while those who are soft and weak are able to preserve their lives,” the taoist philosopher Wu Cheng declared.
Often, when we start putting too much importance on material things, monetary value and social status, we lose touch with our flexibility and joie-de-vivre. A tree that has no fruit to offer, remains erect. Chanakya has declared, “Trees laden with fruit and virtuous people always bow down. But neither does dry wood, nor a fool.”
In Exodus 32:9, God’s main criticism regarding the Children of Israel to Moses is not their idolatry, but that they are a “stiff-necked people,” and therefore worthy of destruction. The blasphemy of idol worship takes a backseat to their flawed character of self-assuredness and being too set in their ways. Stiff-necked people are creatures of habit, which become especially rigid during times of stress. Refusing to take criticism, getting stuck in mindless ritual, and not taking commonsense advice, are all detrimental to our well-being. Being flexible and adaptable are essential characteristics that help us thrive socially, emotionally, and spiritually.
Bruce Lee said, “be like water making its way through cracks. Do not be assertive, but adjust to the object, and you shall find a way around or through it. If nothing within you stays rigid, outward things will disclose themselves. Empty your mind, be formless. Shapeless, like water. If you put water into a cup, it becomes the cup. You put water into a bottle and it becomes the bottle. You put it in a teapot, it becomes the teapot. Now, water can flow or it can crash. Be water, my friend.”
The poet Kalidas was widely respected. However, other pundits in the region were jealous of him. They thought that he was not as knowledgeable as them. They called him for a debate to prove their superiority. Kalidas was unwilling to get into these arguments. But on being urged by his friends, he went there. The king, the referee, pointed towards a dead gnarled tree, and asked them to compose poetry on it. The famous royal poet (said to be Dandi), said, “shushkam kashtham tishthati agrey” (dry wood lies ahead). Kalidasa spoke, “neerasa taruvara purati bhaate” (a lifeless tree appears before us). One can clearly feel the lilt and cadence of Kalidasa’s interpretation. His words had made the dead tree come alive, rather than reinforcing its decrepit dryness.
Some people become hardened and dry even in their prayers, rituals and traditions. Deep worship comes out of an overflowing of love. Sage Narada, in the Bhakti Sutras, declares that the highest form of love is prayer. Such love is a living flow- sweet, tender and gentle. Where there is flow, there is change, and life blossoms. Deep knowledge makes us humble. Love cannot be hard and stiff. It makes us appreciate life. True prayer makes us childlike, innocent and flexible. When we make something pure and tender in our lives, we begin to experience the miracle of being alive.
Deepam Chatterjee is a prolific writer, storyteller and corporate speaker, integrating Modern Life Lessons with Military History, Hindu Scriptures, Mythology and Mysticism. He can be contacted on deepamchatterjee@yahoo.co.in