Purity and cleanliness are qualities essential for a happy and peaceful life. When one is pure and clean, physically and spiritually, there cannot be any sorrow. Even one impure thought – be it of anger, hatred, or lust – can destroy our peace of mind, and we experience discomfort, agitation, and ultimately, sorrow.
In the spiritual sense, purity is often taken to mean being free from lust, but all kinds of desire are the products of lust. To be completely pure means to have no desires — each desire has many facets. First, there is the desire for material possessions. Second, there is the desire is to get something from others – love, respect, cooperation. Thirdly, different kinds of desire arise in relationships. Even charitable deeds can be motivated by, or give rise to, desires.
If anything attracts us, it is because of desire. It is self-deception to say, “I don’t want it really, it is just that I like it.” Be it an object or a person, to have a special attraction towards them – to like just that thing or individual – means there are desires. It is alright to like everything and everyone, but if we like only one particular thing or person, it is a sign of desire.
We may appreciate the fact that someone is helpful, loving, virtuous or good-natured. It is one thing to note their good qualities and imbibe them but quite another to be attracted to them because of their goodness — such attraction gives rise to desires.
Not just attraction, even feelings of dislike and enmity bring us down. Being jealous or holding a grudge against someone also gives rise to desires – to see others fail or suffer. This finishes our peace and happiness, and the mind is always in upheaval.
What are the signs of being impressed by someone or something? There will be attachment and subservience. Similarly, the signs of jealousy or enmity are, trying to prove oneself right, and being stubborn. We do not realise how much time and energy are wasted in having these kinds of feelings, but they cause much loss. They distress us and others. And if someone points out to us the error of our ways, we offer justifications: “What is the harm in it? It is just friendship”, or “I have to do this. There is no other choice.”
Out of a desire for praise and fame, or a wish to show oneself as better than others – due to jealousy – we may have the thought, “I will show them that I am no less than that one.”
The very fact of having such a misguided resolve is a sign of a spiritual downfall. It is brought about by arrogance, and the resulting ill-feeling distances us from others and robs us of their goodwill.
An arrogant person has little self-respect. It is self-respect that helps us step away from desires, which in turn leads to happiness and peace.
B.K. Dr Savita is a Rajyoga teacher at the Brahma Kumaris headquarters in Abu Road, Rajasthan.