A day before my 18th birthday, (which now seems like a century ago) I was ready to conquer the world. Being 18 meant taking on many responsibilities and heading on a journey towards being a mature adult. I decided that I must sort out my life and do whatever it was that all the adults out there did. So, I guess the first thing I should’ve done on my birthday was to have the determination to take on the world, right? Ironically, on the morning of my 18th, the first thing I did was cry like a baby!
Often, life doesn’t go the way we expect it to. At times, lifelong friendships fail us, dreams are shattered and whatever usually brings us contentment turns into frustration. The world seems to slip through our fingers and our step-by-step plan to reach our fairy-tale ending meets unlimited obstacles.
Like a few other human beings, my first reaction in situations like this is to run awayand hide in a small cocoon, one frequently consisting of hot chocolate and a couple of blankets, so that no one can penetrate my mind. I end up pitying myself, a situation that I’ve landed myself in, at times, while embracing an instance of failure that has made an appearance in my life.
But a dear friend once said something that struck a chord deep within my obstacle-ridden heart. “Some of us love to feel sorry for ourselves and stay in that state of despair which becomes a familiar state.” How beautifully that thought portrayed my state of mind at the time. The realization struck that I didn’t want to get out of that sorrow even if it meant I could find happiness, simply because of the warm ease that I felt in that zone. Though nature intended humans to use their legs for better things, individuals like me end up using them for something as silly as running away from our ideas of happiness. That too simply because we met with difficulties and it was actually time to embrace them! Only through overcoming the fear of losing something do we end up seeing the marvel son the other side of our cocoon.
One step to achieving that state in this new year is to have a concrete goal. We must identify broadly where we would like to be and develop a strategy of how to get there, no matter whether we end up reaching there or not. We must recall what Lord Krishna said to Arjuna upon the battlefield of Kurukshetra: “Karma karo, phal ki ichhamat karo.”
The second step is to summon the courage to fight against the demons that hide within you and galvanise your will even before you start. The third and most difficult step is to never give up, no matter what! Believe in yourself and when you feel like quitting, ask yourself, ‹Why was it that I set out to do this in the first place?’
I think this is the most crucial step and one that’s often overlooked. If you still don›t get your desired result, then take heart. Take a break, rest, indulge in some warm chocolate brownies and watch the twentieth re-run of Kal Ho Na Ho; and when you feel the time is right to start again, rush in like a tornado with renewed energy!
This world is a beautiful place if you see it as such. Every new year has the potential to start out exactly how you want it to be. You should feel no inner pressure to make it the best year of your life. But perhaps, you could try to ensure that it turns out to be slightly better than the previous one. We all have resolutions in the form of goals that we want to attain, yet many a time we give them up only due to the fear of losing. Sri Yukteswar Giri, Guru of Paramahansa Yogananda, author of The Autobiography of a Yogi once said «Look fear in the face and it will cease to trouble you.»
So in 2024, please determine to be braver, stronger and kinder to yourself than you were the last year. By doing this, you will gradually realise that the world is actually falling into place, and is carving a pathway to lead you towards being a more contented self. And what’s more? One day, not so far from now, you› l’ll glance into the mirror, look yourself in the eye and with a slight smile say «Yes! I did it!»
