Indira Gandhi once lamented, “All my games were political games; I was, like Joan of Arc, perpetually being burned at the stake.” She was acutely conscious of the relentless scrutiny and judgment she faced due to the towering and influential political legacy she had inherited. Nonetheless, she tirelessly endeavoured to forge her own identity amidst the cacophony of expectations. In a similar vein, Benazir Bhutto, articulated her resolve to be acknowledged for her own achievements rather than merely basking in the reflected glory of her father: “My father was a martyr, a hero. I am the daughter of a person who was hanged, persecuted, and denounced. This is my heritage, but it is my actions that will define me.”
There is something profoundly compelling about the spirit of daughters of legendary and supremely accomplished fathers. This dynamic differs markedly from father-son relationships, where, at the risk of generalization, sons sometimes take the legacy as a given. In contrast, within the framework of Asian cultural mores, where sons are traditionally regarded as the rightful heirs, daughters often harbour an incandescent ambition to vindicate their own worth. Numerous other women have grappled with the shadows of their illustrious fathers, striving to etch their own legacies into the annals of history. Among these are Queen Elizabeth, Sylvia Plath, Christina Onassis, Anne Morrow Lindbergh, Shabana Azmi and lastly, someone who has often been under fire from all quarters and derisively labelled a “nepo kid,” – Alia Bhatt.
What do you think binds these names together? They are each exemplars of brilliance within their respective spheres. While it is undeniable that their fathers must have played pivotal roles in shaping their paths, attributing their achievements solely to familial influence would be a grave oversight. Through the lives and journeys of these extraordinary women we discern a pattern of remarkable resilience and resolute determination- emerging not merely as daughters of distinguished fathers but as luminaries in their own right.
It’s not only the exceptionally accomplished who endure incessant scrutiny, criticism, and discrimination; these judgments infiltrate our everyday lives, often creeping in without warning. Recently, I found myself at a public event where one of the speakers (undoubtedly with innocent intent) made a remark about – a distinguished woman seated on stage, noting how marvellous it was that she now sat in the very chair her father had occupied several decades ago. Although I believe he intended no malice, the impact of his words was palpable. Her opponents, seated in the audience, shifted uncomfortably in their seats, and exchanged fleeting, knowing smirks.
In that charged moment, I stole a quick, surreptitious glance at her face, and what I saw struck me deeply: an expression of stoic, dignified disappointment. Her eyes betrayed a silent, profound weariness even in the face of such casual undermining. It was as if the weight of perpetually being reduced to her lineage, rather than her own merits, pressed down upon her shoulders. As an outsider to this small city, I must confess that, for years, I had no idea who her father was. I came to know her through her relentless, ceaseless, tireless hard work alone.
The innate desire to help our kin is part of our humanity. Yet, there are women who, through sheer determination and talent forge a path to establishing their own identities. Despite their relentless efforts, these women are often marred by frivolous memes and comments, suggesting their fathers deserve lifetime achievement awards for simply handing them opportunities. When whispers circulated about why another woman I know, hadn’t applied for the most sought-after position, I knew the answer deep within my heart. I knew because I, too, am one of those daughters. Her silence -a poignant testament to the invisible burdens that capable, passionate women bear in a world too quick to reduce their accomplishments to mere acts of nepotism.
Whenever I publish a book and decide to use just my first name, omitting both surnames- either inherited through progeny or associated by matrimony, people frequently question this choice. While I remain indifferent to the speculative stories they may weave in their minds, I must admit I feel no excitement to answer their questions. In fact, I find such inquiries rather irritating. My prevailing thought in response to these questions is often, “Is that truly all you noticed in my work? The absence of a surname? Astonishing!” Yet, there are moments when I find myself brushing it off with a laugh, saying, “Oh, there are already too many highly accomplished people in my family with that surname. So, I’ll just stick to being associated and known by my first name.
Beneath the humour lies a deeper truth—a profound desire to step out from the shadows of my family’s legacy and be recognized for my own merits. That laughter, while it may seem dismissive, is my way of shielding myself from the pain of expectations and judgments. It’s a small rebellion, a way of asserting my own identity and silently insisting that I am more than just a surname or a lineage – a person with my own dreams, struggles, and triumphs.
As society evolves, it’s crucial that we reassess our perceptions of successful women, particularly those with influential family backgrounds. Rather than automatically attributing their accomplishments to nepotism or family connections, we must strive to evaluate each individual on their own merits, skills, and contributions. This shift in mindset not only benefits these women but also enriches our collective progress. By recognizing and celebrating the unique achievements of these daughters, we create a more inclusive environment that encourages all individuals to pursue their passions and ambitions, regardless of their lineage. It’s time we move beyond the reductionist view of ‘daddy’s little girl’ and embrace a narrative that acknowledges these women as complex, capable individuals who are actively shaping their own destinies and, in turn, our world.
The author is Assistant Professor, University Institute of Legal Studies, Panjab University, Chandigarh
