Before he became a spiritual master, Gurdjieff had a turbulent life. With his family perennially on the move during his childhood, they lived like vagabonds in makeshift camps in the erstwhile Russian empire. In those tough conditions, the young Gurdjieff was constantly involved in brawls and gang fights.
One day, his ailing father summoned him. When Gurdjieff met him, his father was on his deathbed. Much to his surprise, his father told him that he’d bequeath his treasure to Gurdjieff, who took the words as a clear sign of unsteady mind. Treasure? Here they were living each day on either mercy that the local authorities showered upon them or brute force that he exhibited through his gang. Which treasure was his father referring to?
‘Listen carefully,’ his father told Gurdjieff. ‘Since you’re invariably caught up in situations where you react immediately with an agitated mind, follow this simple advice: Don’t react. Instead, respond after a day’s time. Tell the opponent you’ll come back the following day and answer. Let a day elapse and observe the change.’
These words soon faded away from his mind until a few months later, when Gurdjieff suddenly recalled them just as they were about to attack their rival gang. He was amused as to why that thought struck him. Even though he had dismissed it earlier, Gurdjieff decided to test the veracity of his father’s words. Much to everyone’s shock, Gurdjieff told them to hold back.
The wait was magical. By evening, Gurdjieff had started wondering why he had such extreme feelings towards his rival. By the next afternoon, the change in his thoughts shocked Gurdjieff. He was now not only thinking of the futility of a violent reaction, but was even empathising with the opponents. After all, they too were looking for basic needs exactly as he did, he reasoned. The change was cathartic, and he’d recall it throughout his life. Such maturity at merely nine years of age!
May we try this whenever confronted with a dire situation. Many a time, the circumstances that perturb us at a certain moment don’t seem so dreadful when separated by time. With the passage of time, the mind that was earlier agitated invariably develops objectivity. So remember the cardinal rule: respond, not react.
Rajessh M. Iyer is a storyteller who explores human relationships through meaningful anecdotes, parables, and stories; he shares his work on www.rajesshmiyer.com.