Question : I have two children one is 13 and one is 15. Both are teenagers and my partner, and I realize that it is a difficult stage for them and us but we want to know what are the skills we need to teach them so that they are equipped to deal with themselves and the world in a better way.
Answer: Teenage is a difficult stage. Adolescence is a stage where there is emotional and social upheaval along with physical changes. Take a coke bottle and give it a good shake and cap it. You can see the fizz ready to burst, well that is how the teenage body is due to the hormonal changes. Not easy for either parents or the teenagers.
What we can help them with is teaching them the necessary skills so that they can cope with themselves and others.
Essentially, they need help in :
Thinking Skills: Creative thinking, Critical Thinking, Decision Making, Problem Solving are the thinking skills. Thinking skills relate to certain strengths with regard to cognitive abilities at an individual level. Creative thinking is a novel way of seeing or doing things and generating new ideas, flexibility and shifting perspective easily, originality, and building on other ideas. Decision making is a skill that can help an adolescent deal constructively with decisions about their lives. They can learn to assess the different options available to them and consider what effects these different decisions are likely to have. Problem solving helps in empowering the adolescent to look at a problem objectively vis-à-vis the different options for solutions. And Critical thinking is the ability to analyze information and experiences in an objective manner.
Emotional Skills: can be perceived as a skill not only in making rational decisions but also in being able to make others agree to one’s point of view. To do that, it is important to teach adolescents to be able to identify and manage their own internal conflicts and feelings, emotions, stress and enable them to resist peer and family pressure. They include Self Awareness, Empathy, Coping with Emotions, and Coping and Managing Stress. Empathy is the ability to imagine what life is like for another person. When an adolescent is able to understand themselves, they will be better prepared to communicate and at the same time, they will be able to elicit support from others, and win their understanding. Empathy can help adolescents accept others who may be very different from them. Coping with emotions includes recognizing emotions within themselves and others, being aware of how emotions influence behaviour, and being able to respond to emotions appropriately.
Social Skills : skills related to dealing with others are known as social skills. Social skills are those interpersonal skills that come to fore when a person interacts and communicates with those around them. These include Interpersonal Skills, and Effective Communication.
Life Skills : Money or Budgeting Skills and Cooking or Food Skills. Money may not be the most important thing in life, but it certainly is vital for a comfortable life. That is why financial discipline is an important skill to teach. Budgeting skills help teenagers learn the value of money, conscious spending, and planning for the future. Teaching Teenagers about where to buy groceries, ingredients, nutrition helps them survive and understand the kind of food they should be consuming.
Dr Chavi Bhargava Sharma is the founder and CEO of Indic Center for Psychological Wellness and Holistic Health and Conversationalists-Talking Cures.