At the opening of time when I first take a body and step out onto the ladder of life… I am aware that I am a divine spark of light. I live in a world full of love, peace and harmony. This place is remembered as heaven and paradise; it is a time beyond recorded history… At that time, I am filled with love, happiness and joy… but gradually I begin to forget my divine nature.
Life is a journey; it is about learning. On the ladder of life sometimes my footing is sound, at other times I may be standing on shaky ground. I ascend and descend, that is part of life. Each step takes me towards my destination.
Then time moves to a new scene in the drama I am faced with tests and challenges. The vices of greed, attachment, anger, and ego appear to influence my choices. Fear, insecurity and disconnection enter my life. Bit by bit I lose my peace, power, and happiness.
My steps become unsteady as I am attracted by the shine and sparkle of the world outside. In my search for God and truth, I become a seeker… I go to the churches, temples and holy places. I seek out God where I think I will find peace… looking for that One. Yet, in my descent I realize that there also begins my upward journey. Just as when one draws a circle, one goes round and down, and then comes round and up the other side.
When I make a choice to move towards goodness and love, these steps lead me towards the experience of love and happiness. Ultimately, the law of the universe will give me the return. Equally, when I step away from love and truth; that step towards the negative will have an impact on the quality of my life experience. I come to understand how my choices play a key part in how I experience the world.
The hands on the clock of time tick by and history shows me the extreme actions of humanity; everywhere in the world I see suffering. It is a form of hell and my sadness grows. I look again for the peace and love of the beginning time; because this is more than a distant memory. I understand that choices shape my personal history; I am creating my own destiny. The atmosphere of the world impacts upon me, and I need to be mindful of where I place my steps.
As a seeker of truth, I make progress on the path of devotion. It is a long journey.… Stepping inwards, I re-connect with the Divine One, and I find myself once again. The inner journey will eventually take me back to my eternal ‘self’. I am returning. I find I am no longer lost… I have come home. The cycle, the circle, is complete. I am at the confluence age; it is my time to ascend.
I have to climb the ladder of life and worldly experience; eventually coming back to the essence of my true ‘self’; I am returning to the beginning once again. I move closer to the Light… my awareness expands. I know with each step I am ascending. Then I reach the top of the ladder and I can say with confidence and faith that – ‘I know who I am’. A pure, loving light, a child of God. I trust in the goodness of God, nature and the universe. As I infuse my mind and heart with love and light; my life becomes better, simpler, and happier.
I return to where I began… I am at peace. I am on my upward journey… I am coming home.
Aruna Ladva is an author and Rajyoga meditation teacher based at the Global Retreat Centre, Oxford, UK.