Save Books, Bookworms and Wordsmiths

World Book Day was celebrated recently with lots of empty rhetoric. Many bookstores have become history while the bookworms have been put in the red list of the endangered species. Books are sitting ducks for smartphones and OTT channels, who proclaim with a swagger- Thikaane laga diya salon ko. Preserving book culture is as important as saving the tiger. One can lead hundreds of lives in one life (even the life of Natwarlal) by reading books of different genres.
On this day, I take the help of eye drops to become moist-eyed for the sake of the three fiction books authored by me. My literary journey has been no less eventful than the travels of Ibn Battuta. Once, I gifted my novel entitled, ‘Lights! Wedding! Ludhiana!’ to a close friend of mine. After a month, I told him to give his feedback. I expected to hear from him that I had it in me to be the desi version of P G Wodehouse. But he took the wind out of my sails. ‘Honestly, I am using the book as a paper weight. I do plan to read it in my next incarnation!’
‘Kaminey. Main tera khoon pee jaoonga. I am sure you are also using its pages to wipe excess oil off the pakoras. I curse you- You will become a writer after your rebirth and I will pay you back in the same coin,’ I replied.
A few months later, a relative of mine told me that she had bought my book. I thanked her and declared with an air of pride, ‘My book is very clean.’ She called me up after a week. ‘Your book is humorous all right but too clean!’
However, if I had incorporated erotica or double-entendre, some other reader might have labelled me as creator of shoddy humour. Jayen to jayen kahaan. If plot is complicated, the reviewers find it hard to follow the storyline. If there are less twists and turns, the storyline is labelled as ‘dish well-cooked but too bland’.
I do want people to read my books because there is abundant food for thought in the guise of humour. However, I have no delusions- of my writing precipitating mass revolutions. Whenever you hold any book in your hand, do spare a few thoughts for the sacrifices made by the author (just a shade lesser than the supreme sacrifice). I have lost count of the movies, celebrations, matches and serials which were missed because of my love affair with the black and white letters. When I miss a family event, my son and daughter call me an uncle. My better half has stuck with me because of a combination of factors- my compensatory manoeuvres, lack of credible alternatives, inertia and resignation to her fate. Once I was lost in literary thoughts, failed to ‘see’ a glass door and banged into it. A major insult was added to the minor injury by a bystander whom I overheard saying, ‘Nowadays people get drunk even during the day!’
Writing is a mild form of insanity!

Jas Kohli is a noted humour writer. His published work includes three bestselling humour novels- ‘Anything to Look Hot’, ‘Lights! Scalpel! Romance!’ and ‘Lights! Wedding! Ludhiana!’.