If we wish to have peace of mind and be happy, it helps to remember that happiness comes from sharing it with others. We have all noticed how people who are kind and helpful naturally remain happy. On the other hand, those who do a lot of wrongs have little peace or lasting joy. It is a tragedy of our times that a lot of people’s minds are so clouded by their desires, prejudices, and fears that they cannot see the difference between right and wrong.
The world is governed by the law of cause and effect. Every action has an equal and opposite reaction. We tend to forget that this law applies to our life too – we reap the fruit of our actions, and receive from others what we give through our feelings, thoughts, words and behaviour. All our experiences in life are the result of what we have done at some point in time. The soul is eternal and carries a record of its actions through successive lives, and something done long ago, in a past life, can bear fruit in the present. Recognising this fact helps us chart a better course for the future. The past cannot be changed, but we can mitigate the effect of our past mistakes by doing the right things now. Just as we balance a pair of scales by adding weight to the lighter side, doing good adds to our merits, and when the good gradually becomes preponderant, it rewards us with greater peace, happiness, and stability.
For lasting peace of mind, the mind needs to be powerful so that it is not disturbed by the vicissitudes of life. Our mental energy is drained mostly by overthinking, agitation, and emotional upheaval caused by ego, anger, or some other weakness. We argue and fight over trifles, which we blow out of all proportion because our perception is distorted by one or more of the above weaknesses.
To stop this from happening again and again, we need to improve the quality of our consciousness. If we decide to be more mature, responsible, and sensible, we are able to respond calmly to situations and other people’s behaviour. All it takes is a little tolerance and understanding. In time others come to appreciate our calmness and respect us for it, even if they do not say so.
When we change the way we see and respond to people and events, we can avoid conflict. Gradually, our confidence and maturity increase, and so does our stability. This does not mean that life will become a bed of roses. Circumstances and people will test us, but instead of complaining or clashing with them, if we take them as tests, we can learn from them and grow.
Leading a happy life is in our hands. We can reduce our expectations, and we will not be easily upset. In addition, if we are unselfish and maintain a high level of self-respect, not only will our behaviour foster good relationships, our vibrations will provide comfort and strength to others, making our life more meaningful and fulfilling.
B.K. Surya is a Rajyoga teacher at the Brahma Kumaris headquarters in Mount Abu, Rajasthan.