I grew up musically inclined, and into a family where many were genetically gifted with musical abilities. However, I can safely look back and say that I did not quite understand the magnitude of grace that had been showered upon me until rather late in life. It had come a bit too easily and had made me a bit too entitled. In fact, I remember attending most of my music classes a bit grudgingly and sighing whenever people asked me to sing at a family function or at a get-together. The reason I am saying this now is because as my academy imparts music to students across the world, I can see now how earnest and sincere some of them are to progress and develop their musical ability, even if they don’t come from musical families. Their perseverance touches me and sometimes makes me guilty for the years of neglect to which I had subjected my own music, and sometimes still do, such as when I grudgingly sit for riyaaz.
I once had a student who had great difficulty in understanding the basics of being in key. It was a humongous effort for her, and for me, to go on session after session just working towards singing the basic note Sa, the first note of the Indian Saptak or musical octave. It was truly a one-of-a-kind experience, one that I never had before or after that. Hours, days and weeks went by with both of us trying our best and hardest, but to no avail. But her sincerity remained unchanged, her tenacity intact. And then, after a couple of months of relentless effort, voila! it finally happened. She understood! That moment of understanding for her was a burst of happiness for both her and me. It was one of the most memorable experiences ever for me as a music educator. But I went away having learnt as much as I had taught. I learnt about tenacity, sticking with our goals, faith, hope, and grace. Grace that is showered on those who persist and never give up. I also learnt a great deal about gratitude; gratitude for what we have been gifted by God.
Our gifts may be different. Some of us may be musical. Some may have an aptitude for math. Some may be excellent at scuba diving or rock climbing. And some may be great storytellers. It doesn’t matter. Recognising our gifts and being grateful is a skill I learnt through my journey as a musician. I also learnt to be thankful for what I did not have; because in recognising what we do not have, we begin the journey of learning. We begin the journey of self-work. These kinds of gifts are gifts of opportunity and of potential. In pursuing something we do not have, we learn so much. We learn to deal with disappointment. We learn humility. We learn compassion. We also earn wonderful friendships and companionship with fellow passengers on board the learning ship.
Music had taught me a lot so far and continues to do so. Being able to share my music through my own singing and concerts showed me that I can be happy and make people happy with my voice. Teaching and imparting music has opened up the world of people, their struggles and challenges to me and made me humble and thankful. It has also given me the wonderful opportunity to enter their worlds and make a difference to them, even if sometimes in small ways. Because if I can make them sing a song well, I am teaching them how to make themselves happy. If I can create a non-judgemental setting for learning music, I am giving them a safe space to emote and vent through the music they learn and sing.
Dear Music, thank you. May you continue to teach me.
The writer is a vocalist of both Hindustani and Carnatic Classical music, with over three decades’ experience. She is also the founder of Music Vruksh, a venture to make classical accessible for its aesthetic and wellness benefits.