Being cheerful is not just about smiling, it also means being optimistic, and cooperative. Spirituality teaches us to remain happy in every situation.
Some people indulge in self-pity, brooding over what they lack or have lost. The past is past, it cannot be changed, so it is better to look forward to the future. Spirituality restores our self-respect, and we become aware of our true identity, that we are eternal, originally pure souls, and learn to appreciate what we have, including our qualities and abilities. This brings happiness and stability to our life.
But how can we be constantly cheerful? There can be depressing, frustrating, and painful moments in life. How do we remain happy at such times?
When we look at the world around us, we see so much insecurity and sorrow; crime is increasing; and people are not trustworthy. All this puts pressure on us. People also suffer from stress at their workplace, which can lead to burnout when they become mentally exhausted or feel hopeless.
Spirituality puts us on a different footing by giving us a new understanding of the self — I am a being of peace and power. It fosters values in us, and they in turn beget happiness.
According to a Chinese saying, if you want to be happy for life, be honest. We need to be honest with ourselves. We can deceive others, but not ourselves. When we keep checking the quality of our thoughts and feelings, we come to know where we stand.
If we feel uneasy about something, we need to acknowledge it and deal with the cause, or seek help when we cannot handle it ourselves. Repressing our feelings will cause harm.
If we cannot share our feelings with others, we can write them down in a diary. Writing down difficult experiences has been found to benefit one’s mental and physical health, as it lightens the burden on the mind.
One of the most important qualities for being cheerful is being light. Any kind of pressure on the mind makes us thoughtful or gloomy. What does our face look like when we think too much? Certainly not cheerful.
To remain light, it helps to understand that many things are not in our control. We cannot change others, but we can change ourselves. We expect others to change, and feel that when that happens, things will become easier for us. But we need to give people time and space for the change to occur.
When we believe that we are responsible for a task, that too makes us heavy. Instead of the task, it is better to focus on our strengths and abilities and develop those. When we become worthy in this way, our confidence, and people’s trust in us, increase. Even then, it is good to keep in mind that doing the task is a role we have been given – it is not our identity.
Our responsibility is to be available for the task, alert, accurate and diligent. Then, accepting the result of our efforts keeps us light. Even if we fail, we gain experience. On the other hand, when we do not accept a situation and keep asking why — ‘Why me?’, ‘Why did this happen?’, ‘Why did they do this?’ — it can create anger, resentment and frustration. Acceptance saves us from these harmful emotions.
Courage also helps. Courage means being optimistic, seeing the good in the self and others. Courage is needed to accept one’s mistakes, check if there is a flaw in our attitude or beliefs, and make the necessary correction.
Service, too, brings happiness. The joy we spread by serving others returns to us multiplied several times over. Sharing our wisdom and enthusiasm boosts our happiness. Service also provides us with a purpose in life, enhancing our sense of self-worth.
In the end, it is about working on the self – checking where we can improve, doing the needful, and thereby progressing. When we busy ourselves with self-improvement and service, the mind remains free from unwanted thoughts, and conscious efforts to stay positive keep the graph of our happiness rising.
Dr Pratap Midha is Medical Director of the Global Hospital and Research Centre in Mount Abu, Rajasthan.